I believe most people spend an inordinate amount of time dissecting conflicts or things they are not totally satisfied with. (That sounds a lot better that saying we worry about a lot – let’s make it sound proactive.) He said, she said, that must mean, I can't believe that...
We can get so caught up in the details of each side of a story, the black and white, the right and wrong, the scorecard, that we miss the most basic of principles, which is to not do anything until I there is clarity. Anxiety and stress tend to run the show, as modern social studies show us. We try to measure things that are not measurable, therefore attempting to force clarity.
A quote that inspires my life on a daily basis is by the crazy-haired, brilliant scientist/philosopher, Albert Einstein. It reads,
“When the solution is simple, god is answering.”
The right answer is the simple one.
We muddy the waters of life with our selfishness and our attempts to control and make something happen or not happen. I'm at fault for this - I often times I believe I am in charge of the results. Our subconscious clings with a death grip to the idea that if we only hope hard enough, try hard enough, and give enough that life will all happen exactly as we desire it to. It’s a lot of work and energy.
Which is why trying, controlling, and forcing is not the simple answer.
It doesn’t mean the simple answer is the easy or painless one; it is just the right one. It’s simple because it’s the one that resonates with the deepest part of who we are. We intuitively know if something works for us or not, or if we like something/someone or not. That’s the simple answer.
So the next time you’re wondering if you should/shouldn’t date someone, or go to that event function or spend time with that person, take a deep breath and think about good'ol Einstein. He just might help you find what the truest, simplest answer is for you.