Thursday, July 17, 2014

No Drama, No Gossip, No Stress, No Problem

I’ve been purging this year. Purging as much as possible. I moved for the 7th time in four years in the spring [somanylongstories], and that brought even more purging of material things that held meaning at one time, with certain connotations, and it was simply time to be rid of them altogether. My navy blue, velvety sectional couch included. Sad face.

Photos, letters, mementos, and boxes upon boxes of crafting supplies that I splurged on when Pinterest hit the scene in 2010. I was inspired, what can I say. I also donated a few blouses I’ve had since college. Yep, it was time for me to break up my long-term relationship with Old Navy circa 2002, too.

This all falls in line with what I’ve shared about here, I’ve been actively engaged in an internal, spiritual cleanse. Purging old mental and emotional habits like self-doubt and fear, breaking down blockades to a peaceful spirit, and addressing my severe allergy to vulnerability.

Slowly, things are coming together. Newness is emerging – and it’s incredible. 
Journeys to wholeness are rarely easy..... and never short.

Part of this whole process has recently resulted in the ending of some friendships and the purging of what came along with them – drama, gossip, and unnecessary stress. My heart is both sad and relieved to have these changes, honestly. I believe in having the best possible relationships with all people... AND sometimes the best possible status of a relationship is “not close.”

There can be any number of reasons for this and it doesn’t mean one or the other persons involved are bad people. Similar to romantic relationships, sometimes the chemistry between two people just doesn’t work. We want different things and we have different values and expectations.

That’s okay.
Everyone is entitled to be as they are.
But we don’t have to be close to all people as they are if it’s not good for us.

I’m processing through some of that and it still carries a strong energy of awkwardness for me. However, it feels pretty great to have freedom from high-drama, gossip and judgment, unattainable expectations, complaining, codependency, passive-aggressive behavior, and the stress all of that brings. Those aren’t things that I engage in and they don’t work for me in any sort of relationship. That’s my line in the sand.

And to be 100% honest, people have “broken up” with me in several friendships in the past because I behaved in some of those unsavory ways. They had a right to do so. I commend them for their choice and integrity.  

It was through some of those painful friend-break-ups that helped me learn about what I wanted my own boundaries to look like. I don’t do it all perfectly today but I do a pretty kickass job of it.

If we only have one, precious chance to live the life we have, it might as well be the one we want. Purge the clutter... the head chatter... the fears... the things holding you back from really being who you are. Get rid of anything that doesn't work for you. Maybe hold on to your blue sectional couch if you can, though.

Brene Strikes [my heart] Again

Well, this made me cry.

Saturday, July 12, 2014

"Fun" & "New"

For the six people who follow my blog, you might remember that my word for the year is fun. As cheesy as it may sound, I’ve been too busy having fun to write here. I also adopted a sub-category of fun, which is “new.”

New used to induce a gag reflex. I hated it. It represented lack of control, possibilities and –worst of all- changes. Shutter. No possible way to know outcomes, nothing is for sure, and holy crap where is my mom. Hints of “new” came like the entrance music for the Wicked Witch of the West.

Now? It turns out that I like new. A lot. The things that used to hold me back or cause fear now draw me in. New restaurant? Sign me up. New beverage to try? Sure (although ginger-anything is NOT MY FAVORITE). New friends? I could use more. It likely sounds ridiculous to anyone who is not me, but hey, this is my blog.

Here are some of my 2014 Fun & New lists...

1)    I'm a pro with Madison’s daily IV
I won’t bring it down in my first sentence. My cat was diagnosed with kidney failure earlier this year and this has resulted in the need for me to administer a daily IV drip to keep her hydrated. Stick a needle in my pet? Are you KIDDING ME? What started off as a teary, scary endeavor has turned into a beautiful daily bonding opportunity. It’s just a part of life for us, and we are used to it. Okay, so it’s not so much fun as it is just new. #Iambrave

Not a professional. (@ Womack & Bowman)
2)    I now take aerial classes
Yes. It sounds as awesome as it is. I get up on silks and hang and flip and swirl and everything. (I won't use technical language for common folk... but my split inversions are SOLID. Not pictured.) Not easy, it's a hard workout. I’m pretty badass, but I'm only 1% as badass as my trainer, Rachel. JEEZ.

3)    I stayed in a new hotel & saw Cirque’s “O” show
I prefer to stay in tried and true places when I travel. This month, I changed it up and stayed in a hotel on the Las Vegas strip I have never stayed at. The pools were a spectacle and everything I anticipated. My partner even got a deal with $35 food/beverage credit, which purchased approximately one margarita. Whatever. We would have paid anyway. BUT THEN... I took us to see both of our very first Cirque du Soleil shows, O. Words cannot describe the experience because it was that impressive.

1)    I ate raw fish
I have only started to eat sushi (actuality: cooked fish rolls) in the last two years. I pretended to like it because it is all the rage for people I fancy to have a good palate. Then, I had the Albacore Poke appetizer at Warren’s Blackboard. I’m a believer.

2)    I made something fancy
I found dates at Trader Joe’s and bought them before looking up a recipe. Came home and found one immediately. Made broiled dates stuffed with goat cheese and almonds with a honey-balsamic sauce. Recommended.

3)    I tried something green in liquid form
I work in Malibu and I tend to believe we have the best of everything there. So I ordered a kale shake one morning. I thought it would taste bad. It did. I finished it to prove a point to myself.

1)    I am getting published again
I’ll be published with Tiny Buddha soon! The founder is very kind and complimentary. I’ll link to it on here when it comes out.

2)    I am co-founding a company
That sums it up. Co-founding an all-female consultancy for some of the most incredibly talented, boss ladies in Los Angeles. I’m heading up DNA for our consultants and core team development as well as being a featured consultant and trainer. Details to come... launching soon!

And that about wraps my year up to this point. Fun, new, and everything between. The best part is I'm surprising myself nearly every day. Intention to action... I'm loving it.